Funny Equestrian Shirt for Women | “My Gelding Has More Balls & He’s Castrated” | Western Cowgirl Tee | Horse Girl Humor Gift

From The Dog & Pony Show — where we serve barn sass, gelding facts, and a whole lot of attitude.

Let’s get one thing straight: if your gelding’s got more guts than most men, this shirt is for you.

Our “My Gelding Has More Balls (and He’s Castrated)” tee is a tribute to every fearless, sarcastic, whip-smart woman who’s ever been told to tone it down. (Spoiler alert: we don’t.)

With retro western flair and a bold statement only a true horse girl could wear, this tee is soft enough for mucking stalls and snarky enough for Sunday brunch with the judgy neighbors.

Whether you're in the saddle or just silently judging from the fence line, this shirt does the talking for you.

Perfect for:

Sassy equestrian women with zero time for fragile egos

Cowgirls who sip iced coffee while holding grudges

Western fashion fans with a mean gelding and a clean tack room

Women who keep receipts and hoof picks handy

Gag gifts, barn bestie birthdays, or chaotic horse show fits

Product Description & Features:

Gelding-tested, cowgirl-approved sarcasm

For women who sip iced coffee and wrangle chaos

Printed on buttery-soft Bella+Canvas 3001

Perfect for barn babes who speak fluent gelding

Vintage retro graphic with western attitude

Makes your ex uncomfortable and your trainer cackle

True-to-size fit that handles hay days and high drama

The ultimate gift for sarcastic horse lovers and equestrian queens

Hey y’all — quick note from the barn!

Every design in this shop was dreamed up right here in the chaos of my coffee-fueled, critter-filled corner of the world. I create each piece myself using a mix of Canva magic and AI mischief — all with a side of barn sass, of course.

𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐬

100% Airlum combed and Ring Spun Cotton

The tear-away label minimizes skin irritations

Fabric blends: Ash and Heather Prism colors - 99% cotton, 1% polyester; Heather and Solid Blend colors - 52% cotton, 48% polyester; Athletic Heather and Black Heather - 90% cotton, 10% polyester

Made in the USA

𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐞

Orders are sent to production within 24 hours of being placed

Production time is typically 2–5 business days

Standard shipping takes 4–8 business days, depending on your location. Standard Plus Delivery takes 2–5 business days

𝐒𝐢𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠

Unisex, Runs True To Size

Refer to the photographs to review size chart

For an oversized look, go for two sizes larger

𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

Machine wash on a gentle cycle and tumble dry low or air-dry

Avoid fabric softeners, bleach, and dry cleaning

Do not iron directly on the design to maintain its integrity

Stealth SEO Attack (Because we’re professionals)

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